|
|
|
|
|
My Name Is Chloe: Diary Number 5 (Diary of a Teenage Girl)
| Our Price |
$ 11.19
|
|
| Retail Value |
$ 13.99 |
|
| You Save |
$ 2.80 (20%) |
|
| Item Number |
10245 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
Item Description...
Overview
Struggling with the challenges of growing up, free-spirited high-school freshman Chloe experiences renewal after a life-changing experience and expresses her new-found faith by performing in a Christian rock band. Original.
Publishers Description
Chloe, Josh Miller's younger sister, is a free spirit with funky clothes and dramatic hair. She struggles with her own identity, classmates, parents, boys, and -- her biggest question -- whether or not God is for real. But this unconventional high school freshman definitely doesn't hold back when she meets Him in a big, personal way. Refusing to change her image to fit into the "stereotypical Christian preppy mold," Chloe expresses God's love and grace through the girl band she forms, Redemption. In her development as a musician and performer, tender-hearted Chloe will learn tough lessons about following God, her heart, and her dreams.
Melody Carlson is the bestselling author of more than seventy books for teens, women, and children with total sales over 1 million. She has two grown sons and enjoys an active lifestyle of hiking, skiing, and biking. She lives in the beautiful Oregon Cascade Mountains with her husband and Labrador retriever.
Chapter One
Monday, September 2
I don’t hate my life anymore. At least not today. I guess I consider myself a recovering pessimist. Or at least I’m trying. I used to be completely negative and cynical about everyone and everything, but I found that made it difficult to breathe. So now I’m trying to be more of a realist. That way I can be negative when I choose to, but there’s still a little room for hope.
Some people think I am dark. I suppose they’re a little frightened by me. By my appearance, or my opinions, or the way I look them straight in the eye without blinking or turning away, or even my music, which can be, I suppose, unsettling. Although I doubt they’d ever admit to such fears. Because no one likes to fess up to being scared.
But I’ll admit to it—at least within the privacy of my own journal. I seriously doubt that I’ll go take out an ad in the Daily Times and go public with this news. Like anyone would care.
But it’s true: I am scared. And sometimes I scare myself. Okay, I’m not talking about when I look in the mirror, although that can be a little frightening, especially on those mornings when I have flattened down bed head and my eyelashes are stuck together with that gluck that gathers in your eyes while you’re asleep. But for the most part it’s not my appearance that scares me. Although I’m sure I seem frightening to some people—narrow-minded people who want everyone to look the same—like cookie-cutter characters where everyone has a happy face stamped right into their heads.
I’ve seen people stare at my hair (I cut it myself— all jaggedy so it can stick out in all sorts of interesting shapes, and I like putting colors on it, such as magenta and lime and purple), and I’ve seen some people stare at my multiple-pierced ears and belly button and wince or just back away. As if this is something unusual. And I suppose I derive some weird sense of satisfaction from their response. Like, see “I told you so.” Does that make sense?
My friend Caitlin O’Conner (about the straightest chick I know) says I use my appearance to keep people from getting too close to me. And maybe she’s right, although I’ve never admitted this to anyone before, except her and then only briefly. But I do sort of enjoy keeping up an exterior that turns some people off—or even frightens them. I figure if they’re so shallow that they’re threatened by my appearance, well, then who wants to know them anyway?
Besides, if you don’t let people get close to you, you lessen your chances of getting hurt by them. Right? And that’s something I could sure live without. Not that I’m afraid of pain, because I’m not. Believe me, I’m not! I just don’t go around inviting it to come over to visit me on a regular basis.
I guess that’s one thing that scares me though—the way I keep shoving people away from me. It’s as if it’s become this habit that’s getting harder and harder to break. In fact, I’ve gotten uncomfortably comfortable with my isolation. Well, for the most part. I mean, no one really wants to be alone all the time. Do they? But somehow Caitlin just pushed her way past all my barbed-wire barriers and brick walls and actually became my friend. Well, sort of. Actually, I still wonder if she reached out to me because my brother Josh told her I was such a pathetic mess. She probably felt sorry for me too, because she’s that kind of person—overly caring and sympathetic—something she needs to be careful of, I think. Too much empathy can get you into trouble.
But besides Josh’s involvement, I suspect Caitlin (a Christian who takes her faith real seriously) probably had great hopes of converting me, not that I’ve ever done anything to encourage her. But that’s all history now because Caitlin has just gone off to college. And I’m sure she’ll forget all about me before long, if she hasn’t already. I guess it just proves my point about not getting too close to people. Because in the long run, whether they mean to or not, they’ll eventually hurt you or leave. That’s what I’ve found to be true anyway.
But here’s another thing that scares me about myself: It’s the way I question just about everything. My parents call me rebellious and headstrong. My teachers say I have an attitude problem. Caitlin just says I’m searching. And in some ways I think she’s closer to the truth than the rest of them. But for whatever reason, it seems as though nothing ever comes easily for me.
I’m not like Josh, the golden boy, who just seems to coast through life on his wave of charm, good looks, and general popularity. I’m probably more like my older brother Caleb, although since he left home while I was in grade school, it seems I barely knew him. But his life has been pretty messy too. Actually he’s done a much worse job of
it than I have (so far). I realize that could change for me any day now. And according to my parents it will.
They’re predicting that I’ll seriously blow it in my first year of high school. They could be right. I just might blow it—or blow up. I might explode into millions of tiny pieces and fly throughout the universe. Or maybe I’ll try to prove them wrong. I’m still not sure which way this thing will go.
Caitlin thinks I’m going to do “something wonderful with my life.” Ha! But then she’s like that—the perennial Pollyanna of the new millennium. And I’ll admit I liked that book as a child, back when I thought everything always ended up “happily ever after.” I just don’t believe that anymore. And I don’t mean to slam her exactly, but I do think she’s a little too idealistic. I mean, what could I possibly do that would ever be described as “wonderful”? I don’t even like that word! Like I said, I’m trying to lean more toward realism, even if it does get me down sometimes.
And I suppose that’s why I question God a lot. But that’s only on the days when I still believe in him. Because a lot of times I don’t. A lot of times I wonder about things like religious wars and starvation and child slavery and just general greed and cruelty—and I find it hard to believe that God would allow such chaos.
But Caitlin says it’s okay to question God. She says, “He can handle it.” And she positively assured me that no matter what questions I ask, God has all the answers. But she also said that I might not always like all his answers. But what probably frightens me the most is the very likely possibility that he won’t answer at all—the possibility that he’s not even there—and that we’re all alone on this rapidly spinning ball called earth going nowhere fast. And for some reason that scares me more than anything. But I’d never admit this to anyone. In a way it seems pretty childish to see it written down. It’s as if I try to act all grown up and mature and, I suppose, even tough, but inside I’m just a frightened little kid. Pretty scary, huh?
There we have it. I have just confessed my biggest fears, but I have some smaller ones too. They may seem minor compared to what I’ve just written above, but unfortunately they don’t feel minor right now. I’ll tell you what my most current pressing fear is: School starts tomorrow.
It’s my first year in high school, and I don’t even have one single friend to walk onto campus with. Oh, sure, it’s my own fault since I no longer act, talk, or dress like my old friends. But were they really my friends? Would real friends shun me so easily? I think Jessie and I might’ve eventually become friends again, but then she moved last spring.
But to think I lost all this on account of a moronic boyfriend who stabbed me in the back because I wouldn’t give in to him? How stupid is that? Maybe it was one of those Freudian things, like I really wanted to blow my life into smithereens on purpose. Or not. The fact is, I now have to face entering high school as a solo act. And that freaks me out.
Pitiful, isn’t it? Oh, I keep telling myself that I’ll just act exceptionally hard and aloof, dressed in my tough chick threads (which have sent my mom to her room with a headache again), and I’ll march right in there and take nothing from nobody. But despite my plan, I still feel pretty worried. And a small part of me wishes I’d listened to my mom and gotten some of those more “mainstream” kinds of clothes and tried to make what she calls a “fresh start.”
I suppose this is where my rebelliousness comes into play. I just could NOT do it. I could NOT give in to my mom. I think it’s because I actually like how I look. It’s kind of creative, you know, like an alternative rock star. And so far I only have seven piercings, and I think I’ll keep it at that since seven is a perfect number. And I don’t even have a tattoo (although I’ve been tempted a time or two and am still considering trying a henna one). You’d think that alone would make my mom happy.
And I like how my hair looks all spiky and wild and colorful. Really, I think I look pretty cool. And since I AM a serious and aspiring musician, I think this image works for me. Of course, no one (well, except for Caitlin) really knows how committed I am to my music. Maybe I’ll get more out there with it this year. Maybe I’ll see if I can play at the new coffeehouse that just came to town. Who knows? I could even become famous someday. It happens.
I’ve heard of fifteen-year-olds who’ve hit it big. Besides, everyone thinks I’m old for my age, plus I’m old in my class since my parents started me to school a year late due to a silly childhood illness that didn’t seem like such a big deal at the time, to me anyway. Even my grandmother says I have the soul of an old woman, although I don’t think she necessarily thinks that’s a good thing. But maybe that’s why I’ve always related better to older people. The kids in my own grade feel too immature for me, and yet I still feel like a little kid sometimes too.
Caitlin encouraged me to journal down my thoughts. She said it’s a good way to get in touch with my feelings, although I feel pretty in touch already—sometimes too much so. She also said I should write down prayers. I tried not to laugh when she said that, but I’m thinking: What prayers? I mean, I don’t ever pray. I don’t even want to pray. And why is that? I say I still believe in God. Well, sometimes anyway. So why wouldn’t I want to try praying to him?
I guess it’s because I’m worried that, if he really does exist, he’ll want to change me. And I’m not sure I’m ready for that yet. Even though I’m unhappy and mixed up and feeling a little frightened, I’m still not sure I want to change. So instead of a prayer, I guess I’ll just write down a poem. Because I’m not only a musician, I’m also a poet. And I am me! Chloe.
WHAT IF
what if all there is
is me?
what if i am all i see?
what if life is only this?
and ignorance is bliss?
what if love is only pain?
and nothing can be gained
by living every day
and there is no better way?
what then?
cm |
Item Specifications...
Pages 288
Dimensions: Length: 0.75" Width: 5" Height: 8"
Weight: 0.6 lbs.
Binding Softcover
Release Date Jan 10, 2003
Publisher Multnomah Books
Age 14-18
ISBN 1590520181
EAN 9781590520185
|
Availability 10 units.
Availability accurate as of May 30, 2012 05:20.
Usually ships within one to two business days from Johnson City, TN.
Orders shipping to an address other than a confirmed Credit Card / Paypal Billing address may incur and additional processing delay.
|
About this Author/Artist Melody Carlson is the bestselling author of more than seventy books for teens, women, and children with total sales over 1 million. She has two grown sons and enjoys an active lifestyle of hiking, skiing, and biking. She lives in the beautiful Oregon Cascade Mountains with her husband and Labrador retriever.
Product Categories
Similar Products
Reviews - What do our customers think?
 | My Name is Chloe Sep 30, 2007 |
| Great teenage stories that draw students to want to read the book. I can't keep the series of books in my classroom. As soon as it's checked in it's checked out by someone else. | | |  | My Name is Chloe ROX!!!!!!!!!!! Jun 13, 2006 |
Have you ever read a book that you can relate to?
Well I just a read a book that was just like that.Diary of a teenage girl book 5: My name is Chloe.I found that it was very easy for me to relate to the main character,Chloe.This book has to do with a teenage girl struggling to fit in and dealing with Christianity.
The book is about this girl Chloe Miller.Most people see her as a rebel she wears long weird clothing.She has piercings,her hair is cut in a weird way.She dyes it all sorts of different colors.She feels like there's nothing important in her life.She feels as though no one understands her.She doesn't have a lot of friends people are afraid of her.Her parents aren't all that different her mother doesn't approve of how she looks.She then make friends with an african american christian girl Laura and a girl Allie who's practicing witch craft.She and Allie become christians.They start playing music together and form a christian band.
I really enjoyed reading this book.The words and the message was really powerful.You could tell that the author was writing straight from her heart.It was very spiritual.I highly recommend it. | | | | Always Changing Feb 10, 2006 |
Have you ever felt extremely left out? Like you have don't have friends and no one loves you? Well that's how Chloe Miller, a very confused teen, felt. She had used to be such a good girl, but suddenly her life was changing. It seemed as if she had crossed over to the dark side. She began wearing ratty clothes and she always seemed unhappy. When Chloe thought that everything in her life was as horrible as it could get, she realized she was wrong. On one rainy night in her favorite cemetery, she decided to invite Jesus into her heart and become a Christian. Her life then took another dramatic change as Jesus began to solve some of her problems. She started to easily make new friends, went to church, and started a band. You'll have to read the book to see if Chloe's new life will really work out the way she plans.
This book was very interesting and a lot of things happened that I wasn't expecting. I like the Diary of a Teenage Girl series because the books are written like an actual girl's diary. One of my favorite parts was when Chloe decided to become a Christian. Her life took one drastic change and I really felt happy for her. The only thing I didn't like about the book was the way Chloe started out. She was very unhappy and had different friends. But then, if she hadn't been that way, nothing exciting would have happened.
I have a feeling that only girls would probably like this book. There really isn't anything about these books that guys would be interested in. So, if you think it sounds good, I recommend it to you.
| | | | Chloe Rocks! Dec 15, 2005 |
This novel is very inspirational and should be read by every teenage girl. Chloe Miller struggles with your everyday teenage problems, fitting in at school, parents, and searching for faith. Chloe surrenders her life to God and forms the all girl Christian band Redemption.
This book is a really easy read. It is written in the form of the diary of the main character, Chloe Miller. This gives it such a real feel, the way it is simply written as a teenager would write. It really helps you relate to the character on a personal level. You read what she goes through and her thoughts and emotions, and you feel them too as you read. I love the way Melody Carlson writes. Her characters are so real, so true to life. Each of the people she describes in this story reminds me of someone I know who is like that. Her descriptions are so detailed, that you even imagine the wrinkles in their faces. She really diversifies her characterization. The three girls in the band are so unique and different from each other. There's, of course, Chloe, the fun-loving, sensitive songwriter who takes her faith very seriously. She dresses very creatively and is laid back about her style. Then there's Laura, the very proper and well kept bass player. She's very tidy and self conscious about her appearance and has a very strong sense of morals. Then there's Allie, the drummer. She is bubbly and hyper and never seems to rest. She's boy crazy and altogether silly, and although she's confident in most situations, she still gets stage fright once in a while. The plot of the story is also very strong. When the girls are performing their first concert, you feel their stage fright with them because of Carlson's elaborate description of the setting, and their emotions. So if you're a girl and into music, you should definitely read this book, it'll teach you things about friendship, struggle, music, and God.
| | | | Struggles, Friends, and Christ Nov 22, 2005 |
As a teenage girl Chloe has many struggles in her life: no friends at school, getting tormented by bullies, and having her parents not fully accepting her for who she is. Working through these problems can be really hard for Chloe when she has no one to express her thoughts and feelings too. For Chloe she finds relief in playing her guitar and listening to music. She also goes to a graveyard and visits this one specific grave to just sit and think about what is going on. At school one day Chloe meets some friends that are into drugs and stuff that isn't good for your body, she stays in contact with them-specifically one girl-but never gets into the whole drug thing. Later on she visits the graveyard again where she makes a huge change in her life. Chloe accepts Christ into her heart. From that point on everything seems to get much better for her, Chloe and two other girls are starting a band, her parents take notice of her now, and she just feels better as a person. Through weeks of practice the band has gotten really good together. They are now performing at the Paradiso (a small coffee house in town). There next gig is at the Battle of the Bands competition. With help from Willy, someone from Chloe's church, the bands goes through a tough week of practice to insure that they are ready for the competition. When it arrives they perform and didn't really do all that great but it was ok. After all the bands played their song the winners were announced and to their surprise they got second place. Now what will happen that their band has been noticed by important people in the music business?
I would recommend this book to any teenage girl. This book is categorized as a Christian Fiction but it's also suspenseful in a way. You do not have to read the Caitlin books first to understand this story. There are many sequels to this story that I'm sure are really good. If you just like a good story you'd like this book. I liked pretty much everything about this book; I don't have any negatives to mention. The thing I liked most about this book is how I could take the story and relate it to my own life.
| | | Write your own review about My Name Is Chloe: Diary Number 5 (Diary of a Teenage Girl)
|
Shopping Cart (0 Items)
